i phoned him (surprisingly) and we chatted and it was okay, and he said he missed me. then we started talking about whether it was going to be okay if we meet up over the next week or so, or if he is too busy.

and the phone cut out.

it just went *beeeeeeeep* and carried on like that. i doubt he hung up, he's not like that, he probably run out of battery, and he was just on his way out, so the reason his phone has been off all day is that. i just wanted to hear him say 'i love you' and he didn't say it, because we normally say it at the end of conversations, not the beginning, and we never had a proper 'end' to the conversation.

it was harsh actually, but it was nice to chat to him for a few minutes anyway.

i don't know why i am so insecure about him! i know he loves me, he tells me all the time. i just hate being so far away from him. he sent me a really sweet message at christams, when we had been apart for three weeks, saying 'i love you so much, it hurts to be this far away' which was the sweetest thing ever. just remembering getting that message makes me smile.

i'm just waiting for natilie to come and pick me up. i wish i could drive, so badly. then i could go where i want and do what i want. i could visit dave whenever the need takes me. (although daily visits might annoy him, and cost a lot in petrol) i hate relying on natilie, who isn't the most reliable of people, to drive me about.

we will probably go to the pub. yay. another evening of sitting pretending to be interested in other people's problams when i'm really not.

tum de dum

katiexxx